


Imaginary Lover

by authenticmakki



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Casual Sex, F/M, Friends With Benefits, M/M, Smut, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 06:08:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26847202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/authenticmakki/pseuds/authenticmakki
Summary: A future with him is all Suga's ever wanted but no one said that was what he was going to get.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Michimiya Yui/Sawamura Daichi, Oikawa Tooru/Sugawara Koushi, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi
Kudos: 46





	Imaginary Lover

To Suga, it was no surprise his feelings for Daichi weren’t reciprocated. Deep down he knew Daichi was never going to fall in love with him. Not because they were both males but because someone had stolen his heart before Suga could ever get a chance with him.

Suga was so jealous of her. Michimiya Yui. He didn’t hate her of course but he envied the fact that she was what Daichi was looking for.

They were the classic high school sweetheart situation. Although Daichi hadn’t noticed Michimiya’s feelings until their third year, Michimiya managed to build up enough confidence to tell him.

Suga remembered that day so well. It was like some vivid nightmare. 

They had just finished practice and were cleaning up. For once the crazy duo didn’t stay after practice and went straight home. It was actually the third years who stayed the latest. 

They were aimlessly chatting away about spicy food until someone’s text tone went off and echoed around the empty gym.

The trio turned their heads to the origin of the sound. It took a minute for the three of them to process whose phone it was but they all knew that basic ringtone anywhere. 

“Daichi you really need to change that noise.” Suga laughed.

“What? Why? There’s nothing wrong with it.” Daichi replied innocently.

“Well it is one of the default sounds.” Asahi added.

Daichi looked offended by their comments but shrugged it all off. He casually strided to the stage where his bag resided. The captain shuffled through his bag and pulled out his phone and returned to his friends.

Daichi turned on his phone and was shocked at the person who had sent the text. 

Suga saw his expression and was instantly consumed by curiosity. He strided over to Daichi and peered over his shoulder trying to see his phone screen.

“Oo it must be an interesting text if it made you react like that!” Suga chimed.

“Is it Michimiya?” Asahi asked, also wanting to know.

Suga saw Daichi’s face flush at the mention of her name. Suga saw this and it made his heart sink into his chest.

Suga’s smile faltered for a second but he immediately replaced the frown with another fake grin.

“Daichi~.” Suga said in a teasing tone.

Daichi swatted at Suga and Asahi, the embarrassment filling his stomach.

“Shut up..” Daichi said, his face heating up more. “W-what should I reply with?”

“First of all, we need to know what she said.” Suga pointed out, “Now tell us.”

“She said, ‘Hey Sawamura can we meet up in a bit?’ and that’s it.”

“That sounds so confrontational..” Asahi said anxiously.

“Maybe she’s gonna confess!” Suga suggested. 

Though it hurt to say, that possibility couldn’t be avoided now. Suga knew himself, he no longer had a chance with Daichi. It was obvious Michimiya and Daichi had feelings for each other, only the densest of people wouldn’t be able to tell. Suga could read emotions far better than Daichi could, so he instantly could see the blooming feelings between the two. He wasn’t sure if he would’ve rather not known about their feelings so he could indulge in a false hope of being with Daichi, or known beforehand so he could get over it quicker. Regardless, he would’ve never gotten the ending he wanted. 

“What? No! Maybe she just wants to talk to me about something or something else-.”

“No no, that sounded too serious to be some random conversation. Besides who texts someone out of nowhere to have a casual conversation.” Asahi frowned, holding his stomach feeling his anxiety rise.

“You should reply quickly. It's been a long time since you read the text!” Suga exclaimed.

“Right, you can’t just leave her hanging when she sends an urgent sounding text!” Asahi continued.

“Okay okay. What do I say?” Daichi asked.

Suga held his chin thinking to himself, “Say okay then ask where to meet.”

Daichi nodded and began texting then paused. “What if it isn’t actually urgent and she just wants to text it out?”

“No it sounds urgent. Also texting a confession is horrible, why would she ever do that?” Suga fumed.

“Hey that’s not nice, I texted out my first confession.” Asahi pouted.

Suga turned to Asahi and stared at him, “And how did that confession go?”

Asahi stayed silent and pouted at him in response.

“Exactly.” Suga chuckled, “Just do what I said, Daichi.”

Daichi trusted Suga’s advice and did what was suggested.

From there the third years awaited the response. For the time being, they began to pack up their remaining belongings and headed out of the gym.

They began their walk past Ukai’s store and onward. It was about 15 minutes into their walk when they came across a familiar face.

“Sawamura!” A voice called out in front of them.

Suga shot a smirk at Daichi before pulling Asahi away and moved into a different path. Daichi turned around quickly to see the pair running away. Suga flashed a thumbs up before dragging Asahi off somewhere.

The two ended up going back to Ukai’s store and chilling out there. The two bought canned coffees and took a seat at the table.

Suga’s sweet smile seemed to have faded away since they got to the convenience store. It wasn’t a new occurrence to Asahi however. He noticed Suga getting more and more dismal as Michimiya and Daichi chased after each other. 

It was unsaid between the two of them but Asahi knew Suga had feelings for Daichi and Suga was aware of Asahi knowing. Asahi never really brought it up to Suga because he was afraid he was going to upset him but now seemed like he was supposed to ask about it.

Asahi scanned Suga’s expression. Suga was sipping his coffee and staring out the window, not much emotion in his eyes. 

Asahi placed his can on the table and spoke up, “Suga are you okay?”

Suga turned to Asahi and feigned a smile. “I am why wouldn’t I be.”

Suga’s answer didn’t sit well with Asahi. Suga made it sound so truthful but Asahi knew better than to believe him. Though he decided not to pressure Suga into giving him an honest answer.

Asahi opened his mouth to say something else but was interrupted by his phone buzzing in his pocket. Suga got a notification too because he got caught off guard by his phone vibrating on the table.

Asahi pulled out his phone and checked his messages.

**[Daichi]**

**Not single!!!**

Asahi let out a soft gasp and began typing excitedly. Once he sent the text he put his phone away again and looked up at Suga.

Suga seemed frozen in place by pure shock. Asahi instantly knew it was because of the message.

Suga felt his world crumble around him as he read the words on his phone screen. He licked his lips as he felt himself get lightheaded. Suga knew this was bound to happen but was never prepared for the shock he was feeling when he found out the guy he had a crush on slipped through his fingers in an instant.

Suga began typing a response despite his heart shattering in his chest. He then placed his phone in his pocket and got up.

“Let’s go now.” Suga said calmly. He walked to the trash can and threw out his can then walked out.

Asahi followed suit. They walked side by side, an awkward silence clouding the atmosphere. Asahi felt as if he shouldn’t bring up the text they received but it seemed like it had to be discussed. The little imaginary devil and angel on his shoulders argued loudly at each other but disappeared when Suga stopped walking.

“H-he’s really lucky isn’t he?” Suga asked, looking at the ground. His eyes stung with tears but he pushed them back.

Asahi looked at Suga and gloomed at his tone. “I guess he is…”

Asahi couldn’t stand Suga’s uncharacteristically melancholic attitude and came to the conclusion that he had to be confrontational to stop Suga from forcing himself to be okay.

Asahi turned to Suga, “Suga, why are you acting like that?”

“Acting like what?”

“Like you’re happy for Daichi but you really aren’t”

Suga felt himself lose his cool when Asahi said that. What Asahi said was far from the truth and it pissed Suga off that he would assume such an evil thing.

“What the hell do you mean forcing myself to be happy for Daichi?”

Asahi was not letting himself get intimidated by Suga’s raise in volume. He knew Suga was experiencing a lot of different emotions and sympathized for him.

“You aren’t okay with him being with Michimiya.”

“I am okay with it and I am happy for him! You just don’t get it.”

“Then explain yourself.”

“I’m so happy for Daichi because he gets to be with the girl of his dreams, he gets to be happy with the person he loves, and I’m happy for him because I love him and he loves Michimiya...not me.”

Asahi pulled Suga into an embrace and felt him break down in his arms.

From that day, Suga couldn’t remember the last time he smiled honestly. It was as if when Daichi got into a relationship Suga forgot how to smile.

The couple was together for quite some time now. They were all college graduates and legal adults. 

Suga resented being an adult. He felt like him still having residual feelings for Daichi was childish and something he needed to get over ASAP.

One night, Suga ended up in a bar drinking away his feelings yet again. He felt himself get lost in the alcohol but was still sober enough to form proper sentences and be aware of his environment.

The night was lonesome and quiet most of the time. This was until he heard someone take a seat in the chair next to him but he didn’t bother to look beside him.

“One negroni please~.” 

Suga’s attention was drawn to that extremely familiar voice. He decided to look at the person out of pure curiosity of who it was. 

To his surprise he saw someone he was least expecting in a place like this, Oikawa Toru. They had never spoken before but were aware of each other’s existence. 

Oikawa received his drink and was about to take a sip until he noticed Suga staring at him. Their eyes met and Oikawa smirked at the silver hair male.

“I know I’m handsome but it is rude to stare, you know.” Oikawa snickered.

“Oikawa, what are you doing here?” Suga rolled his eyes from the immediate flirting.

“I’m here for a drink of course, you?”

“Same reason..”

“Well there’s a reason for drinks dontcha think? I’ll share my honest answer if you give me yours.” Oikawa sang playfully.

Suga bit his lip not really wanting to tell Oikawa something that personal. However there was nothing Suga could lose from telling him.

“I’m here for the same reason any lonely person would be here for. I’m here trying to cope with a broken heart.” He chuckled.

Oikawa looked surprised for a moment but smiled at his answer, “I see we’re here for the same reason then.”

This was very shocking to Suga. Oikawa didn’t seem like the type to get overly emotional over a heartbreak yet here he was. Surely it couldn’t have been a serious heartbreak just a small one he could recover from in a few days.

Oikawa took a sip of the pink liquid and frowned at Suga, “Who was stupid enough to break your heart Mr. Refreshing?”

Suga looked at the empty glass in front of him and felt his heart ache in his chest. A sad smile found its way onto Suga’s lips as he thought about Daichi. Suga’s head turned to Oikawa, his mouth still curved into a smile, though Oikawa could tell it was fake. “Do you remember who was the captain of Karasuno in our last year?”

Oikawa took another sip of his drink thinking for a moment, “Sawamura right? God, he’s the one who sent you here?”

Suga laughed lightly. He too was surprised that he ended up in the bar because of him.

Oikawa was more intrigued by Suga’s story and really wanted to know more. 

“Now that I’ve told you who made me come here, you have to keep your end of the bargain and tell me who broke your heart.” Suga demanded playfully.

Oikawa sighed, “I suppose that’s fair. My dearest Iwa-chan sent me here.”

“I see. Did you guys break up or?”

“We didn’t break up, no. He just found someone who made him happier than I could.” Oikawa’s voice sounded so broken through the happy tone he forced.

Suga pitied Oikawa. Though he’s only ever seen Oikawa as an egoistic maniac, it seemed pathetic to know he was also going through some unrequited love story.

“We’re not so different I guess..”

“Sawamura left you for a girl as well.” Oikawa laughed sadly.

This was how their mutual friendship started. At first it was two gentlemen venting about their unrequited love stories but as the night went on and as more drinks were passed out their friendship grew into something more.

They headed out of the bar completely won over by the alcohol. Even though it was winter the drunkenness kept them warm. A taxi headed their way and took them to their destination.

Oikawa pulled Suga into his small apartment to continue their night. Suga threw off his jacket as did Oikawa. 

Oikawa’s lips crashed onto Suga’s. Both could taste the alcohol in each other’s mouths. It was such a strong and distinct taste that it almost seemed like poison.

Each step closer to Oikawa’s bedroom they lost an article of clothing. They weren’t drawn to each other romantically this was just the way the night was going.

Pale hands traced over Oikawa’s now bare back. The lust settling in the both of them and driving them mad. Suga sat on a dresser while Oikawa hovered over him. 

“Suga, you’re allowed to pretend I’m Sawamura if that helps you.”

“That’s weird though..”

“Maybe, but it’s better than not being entertained by me. Besides I know you’d rather be with him right now than me.”

Suga shut his eyes reluctantly and let himself fall into that delusion. That he was actually with the man he fell in love with all those years ago and not with some other broken hearted guy at the bar.

He couldn’t hear Oikawa, all he heard was Daichi calling his name. For the small amount of time it was happening, Suga didn’t feel sad or lonely.

Suga found himself reaching that euphoria quicker than he thought and untangled himself from Oikawa’s body. He opened his eyes half expecting to see Daichi in front of him but was greeted by someone else.

“I’m pretty good aren’t I?” Oikawa teased.

Suga scoffed and put his arms around Oikawa’s neck and leaned into his ear. “Your turn now~.”

Just like that they were back having another round. Though this was an act of burning passion, Suga felt cold. 

They didn’t love each other yet they were indulging in sex like they were a couple. The only thing driving both of them was their constant longing for someone else. They found each other trying to get rid of the lingering feelings of the past.

Oikawa was stuck in his own head. Suga’s moans distorted into Iwaizumi’s voice. Oikawa pushed back the fact that he was with Suga and managed to replace his image with Iwaizumi instead.

Suga was enjoying the pleasure he got from Oikawa. He just wished it wasn’t Oikawa. 

Oikawa quickened the pace, getting sloppier with every thrust. 

Oikawa’s eyes shut tighter as he felt his release. 

Their heavy pants and gasps for air were the only noise in the room. Oikawa pulled away from Suga and placed his hands on either side of Suga.

One final kiss then both of them were back to reality. 

Oikawa lifted Suga off the dresser and placed him gently on the bed. Neither of them smiled.

“You want water or anything.” Oikawa asked quietly, opening the drawer to retrieve some clothes for the two of them.

“No I’m good, I’ll just rest here until I can walk again.” Suga laughed.

He laid down sideways facing away from Oikawa. He stared out the window at the newly falling snow. The moonlight shone through the window and casted out on the blue bed sheets.

Oikawa, now fully dressed, passed a shirt and shorts and his undergarments to Suga.

Oikawa took a seat on the edge of the bed and gazed at Suga. “You can stay the night, if you’d like. It’s a horrible hour to walk out in the cold.”

“You like me that much huh? I’m staying since it’s snowing now.” Suga replied tiredly.

Oikawa smiled faintly and got into bed. He didn’t hold Suga while they slept leaving both of them feeling more cold and empty.

They didn’t feel guilty for lusting for each other, there was no reason for it. They just felt bad for themselves. Sleep came easily to them, but recovery from the sex was hard. They could blame it on alcohol, but while they were together the alcohol didn’t drive them to that point it was their craving for someone else. 

Before Suga left in the morning Oikawa gave him his number, just in case they ever wanted to meet again.

Suga didn’t call him for a while. He didn’t want to. He wanted to keep it as a one time thing.

However, Oikawa called him once and then the meetings didn’t stop. 

When Suga was yearning for someone’s touch he would dial Oikawa’s number and they’d perplex themselves with each other.

Oikawa did the same and this went on for a couple months.

Suga was on his way home from work but crossed paths with someone he wished he hadn’t.

“Suga? Suga!” Called the voice.

Suga turned to his side to see Daichi and Michimiya hand in hand. His lips curled into a fabricated smile as he waved at the couple.

“Haha good to see you guys stayed strong.” Suga uttered happily.

“Yeah, you’re doing well too right?” Michimiya asked.

Suga wanted to tell her he wasn’t but that wouldn’t progress anything.

“I’m doing amazing. What about you and Daichi?”

“We’re doing really good.” Michimiya smiled, “W-we’re actually going to move in together soon.”

Daichi smiled softly at his lover then at Suga.

“Well congratulations! Let me come over once you find a place!” Suga exclaimed.

The group said their goodbyes then parted ways.

As soon as he got far enough from the couple, Suga pulled out his phone and called the one person he wished he didn’t have to run to for comfort.

That night, Suga wished he didn’t see Daichi moving on in life. They were already doing so much in their relationship and Suga was stuck having casual sex with an old school rival.

Suga felt the weight of the world collapse on him as he was gratified by Oikawa’s lust. Being pushed closer to his end, Suga couldn’t help but have Daichi in his mind. 

This was different from all the times before. Now he pictured Daichi at the altar with Michimiya exchanging vows. He imagined how satisfying it must be to be with the one you love.

Suga called out Daichi’s name as he scraped up Oikawa’s back. Oikawa pulled away from Suga but noticed the pained expression he had on his face.

“S-Suga are you okay?”

“Let’s go again.” Suga said, wiping away the free falling tears.

“Are you sure?” 

Suga pulled Oikawa closer to him and they continued.

The sex nulled Suga’s growing jealousy and pain but it wasn’t erased.

The two laid on the bed together. Out of breath and tired, but despite this they were awake.

Oikawa felt like he was obligated to comfort Suga after seeing him cry in front of him. 

He took it upon himself to pull Suga towards his body.

“I’ll hold you until you’re warm again.” Oikawa whispered.

“Then I’ll keep you company until you’re not lonely anymore.” Suga responded.

The pain was far from over, Suga knew that. He accepted Daichi was never going to be his and wanted to live with that fact. 

Daichi had a future with her and Suga still had a chance to seek out his own. It still hurt and probably nothing could ever stop it, but Suga wanted to move on from this. 

For now he was going to hurt as much as he wanted in the arms of another lonely man. Tomorrow he was going to move on. 

**Author's Note:**

> This is inspired by LOVEND's Oisuga dj


End file.
